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Dumbing of Age - Dapper. Comic Reactions: Panel 1: Again, I want to give Joe his props here. This is not something that is easy for him and he’s got a lot of assorted baggage surrounding offering hugs and emotional support.
So for him to recognize something is occurring that he is left outside of and to not only come to the conclusion that “this is a cry for help and Danny needs me”, but to offer a hug is a big thing and hopefully is the beginning of Joe working to clear out some of his toxic detritus. Panel 2: I see your eye level Danny. And I imagine its partially a combination of two things. That Joe is fairly attractive and shirtless and getting a near naked hug from someone you find attractive can be heavily awkward especially if you don’t have that sort of relationship. The old queer overcorrection where you kind of go out of your way not to do certain things with straight folks*, because you don’t want to start that whole conversation where the straight person is interpreting their actions differently because they know they are attracted to folks of the same gender. I don’t think Joe necessarily would and I think his offer is at the very least intended to be genuine, but I can definitely see Danny backing out of the potential of anything in their relationship becoming any more awkward as he knows it’s strained a bit at the moment.*I’m a very huggy person when that’s safe, but I have a reputation in a lot of spaces for being more standoffish and less willing to accept or give things like hugs, because I know being very visibly queer that that will get read very differently than if it happened from a straight peer.
Panels 3- 4: Aw, well if he’s going to go full queer hipster, at least he fell into the earnest bohemian variety rather than the “my racism, classism, and sexism is ironic, so it shouldn’t be interpreted as what it is” variety we tend to get in northern California. And it’s somewhat beautiful. Not just because ukuleles are kinda becoming queer culture, so it’s a connection point between him and that part of his identity.
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But also because this is something he’s choosing for himself, not a romantic partner. He’s defining a style that’s just his and that makes him feel comfortable. And it’s ironic that Joe has such a problem with it, given his own intentional attempt to reinvent himself and his style for college. Not just for the obvious reasons, but also because this is a great example of a harmless reinvention, which stands in direct contrast with Joe’s toxic reinvention and the harm its been doing to those unfortunate enough to fall inside of Joe’s performances of it.
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And it really gets to the heart of a thing I find interesting. We as a society are much more willing to support toxic but normative transformations and reinventions than harmless but non- normative transformations and reinventions. Watch Mike Tyson: Undisputed Truth Online IMDB here.
Like, society barely shrugs its shoulders when someone falls in with neo- nazis or gets really deep into PUA awfulness or “gets born again” and becomes a bible- thumping bigot. Like, sure, some old friends may drift away for their own protection or morals, but we as a system regard that very favorably and even at times encourage it. But someone who does something harmless for themselves and their personal sense of self and society reacts with all the angry condemnation that should befall people who fall into these harmful normative reinventions. Like, for example, see queer and trans folks finding a new style after coming out or any attempt to drift out of typical dress for your gender or even something as small as being this little bit of quirky and eccentric with your ensemble. They get such violent pushback as we see here from this flipside of Joe. Like, he’s so against this, because it’s non- normative, because it’s bohemian, because it’s the (healthy kind of) hipster, but he would have been stunned and out of sorts if Danny had expressed his same dismay at Joe’s favoring of Ed Hardy t- shirts, even though the Ed Hardy shirts project a type of douchebag. And I think it’s a small entry point to how we normalize the extreme policing of non- normativity in favor of status quos and presentations and actions that are not as neutral as we like to pretend they are in society.
St u ff so uth af rica ma y 2.